i forgot parts of this dream almost as soon as i woke up, but when i wrote it down later that day, june 19, 2020, the pieces that stayed were clear. i remember standing on this long white wall, chalky and worn, raised a little higher on one side and lower on the other. i was somewhere near the middle of it, in a place that felt like a huge open garden. the whole area had this ancient greece vibe, kinda like the sonic unleashed greece levels. bright stone, soft curves, that warm mediterranean feeling, but the details are blurry now.
keep reading...
Lost 1UP.com Dead or Alive 4 Preview & Tomonobu Itagaki Interview

this is a lost article from 1UP.com, a site that was shut down in 2013 during IGN's network restructuring. it first appeared on November 17, 2005, written by James Mielke, and it was one of the most interesting pre‑release looks at Dead or Alive 4. it includes a hands‑on with Spartan‑458, also known as Nicole, and a surprisingly personal interview with Tomonobu Itagaki, where he talks about the Halo crossover, his love for Halo, and how it was the only FPS he ever played, usually with his daughter. i wanted to preserve this because it's been with me since my old blog in the 2000s and not many people know how much Halo influenced him or how personal that connection was, and it feels like one of those small moments in gaming history that deserves to be remembered.
tap to orgasm.when we could hold the things we loved in our hands

there's something happening in the background of modern life that feels heavier than people admit. physical media is fading out, slipping away year by year, replaced by digital stores and cloud folders that don't live anywhere you can touch. most people act like it's just a normal upgrade, something convenient and expected. but it's not. it's a cultural loss. a quiet loss of something that made us who we are.
i always say that physical media was never just about ownership, it was an emotional language.
next level glam...the pink tree and the petals dream

some dreams fade the moment i wake up, slipping away like mist. but every now and then one stays with me, bright and lasting like it's trying to tell me something. there are these two dreams from years ago that still sit in my heart, and i think about them sometimes. i generated pics of the dreams to show what i saw a little better.
click for more vibes...the weirdest thing that happened to me in school
sometimes the internet gives you these lil moments you don't really think about until years later, when you look back and go wait... that was actually so weird. the kinda thing that feels almost unreal because it lined up in a way you'd never expect. it's honestly one of the weirdest things that's ever happened to me. this is one of those stories. it happened in the 2000s, back when i lived on sonic forums and fansites, and it's still one of the strangest coincidences i've ever experienced. i shared this on discord and twitter last year, and i wanted to give it a home here too.
the drama deepens...weapon offset and the illusion of choice in game design

in recent years, fps games have leaned heavily into player customization, from FOV sliders to HUD scaling, crosshair tweaks, and more. but one option has quietly reshaped how these games feel to play, and that's weapon offset.
at first glance it seems harmless, just another setting meant to help players tailor the experience. but once you look closer, it becomes clear that it's not just a cosmetic tweak. it's a choice that undermines the visual integrity of the game, encourages competitive conformity, and slowly erodes the immersive presentation developers used to build with intention.
i want to talk about weapon offset because it bothers me, and because i don't like what it represents. players are beginning to accept design choices without thinking about how they affect the game's identity, and it's become part of a larger trend where people take whatever customization the industry throws at them, even when it undermines the presentation the developers intended. modern fps design has become less intentional than it used to.
keep teasing urself...the day my dreamcast almost killed me

quick little story.
back in the early 2000s my dreamcast had the classic lid‑sensor issue, so like a lotta people i played it with the shell off so the disc would actually spin.
one day i had the console under my desk hooked to a capture card. without looking, i reached under to unplug it and rested my palm directly on the exposed power supply, completely forgetting the shell was off.
my hand locked up, my palm muscles twisted, my whole body went hot and fuzzy, and the dreamcast even lifted a few inches on one side with my hand before it slipped off and fell. i was shaking for minutes.
i was being electrocuted. if it hadn't fallen when it did, i might not be here.
so yeah, just felt like sharing. we all messed around with electronics as kids without really understanding the risks, but looking back, we probably shouldn't have been anywhere near open hardware unsupervised.
coming home to myself. my 2000s blog, reborn

i've missed having a space like this. it's a feeling that's stayed with me for years. after years of thinking about it, missing it, daydreaming about it, i brought my old 2000s blog back to life. not as some messy folder of html, images, and random scripts like i used to make them back in the day, but rebuilt using wordpress in my own style. the theme's called babecore, and honestly it feels unreal to see it actually exist. it's beautiful to me.
i've wanted this for so long. a space that feels like stepping into my head. a place that isn't trying to be anything for anyone else. just mine. my escape from the noise and the stress and the constant little annoyances of the world. somewhere i can hang out, write, distract myself, and just relax.
i wanted the site to feel like a place where you can sense me, my energy, my headspace, just by being here, the way old 2000s spaces used to hold a person's whole spirit without trying... almost like stepping back into that time again.
read on, hottie...reaching out for mac support help

i thought it was worth posting this here since there's always people reading my blog, and you never know who might come across it. someone out there might be able to help, just like the amazing contributor who added linux support and leaderboards for us.
for anyone who doesn't know, mbupc is our community driven revival of marble blast ultra, the old xbox 360 arcade classic. we rebuilt it for modern systems so people can play it again, whether they grew up with it or are discovering it for the first time.
mbupc is so close to being finished now. it still feels unreal to say that. the game runs beautifully. linux support is done, leaderboards are done, and now we just need mac support. if anyone out there is willing to help with mac support, it would mean everything to me. this game has been a big part of my life, and seeing it working on pc with leaderboards was emotional for me.
tap for the drama...what my criticism is really about

no one deserves to be hated or mocked for who they are or what they like.
that's something i've always believed with my whole heart.
and if you're ever targeted just for being who you are, i'll stand with you every time.
if you're online, you already know there will always be people who like you and people who don't. sooner or later, someone decides they want to hurt you. they twist your words, smear you, or try to turn others against you. it happens to everyone who's been on the internet long enough.
and if you've been through that, you know how awful it feels, that frustration and helplessness when people spread a version of you that isn't real. i've been a victim of that too.
click to unlock the resttt... 🔓✨

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